Aunty D advises you on matters of life and love.
CLEAN BREAK
Dear Aunty D,
My husband and I both came from humble beginnings, working hard to attain the life of luxury we’re fortunate enough to enjoy now. My husband, however, has chosen to overlook his modest roots, flaunting his relatively newfound wealth for everyone to see, and treating those less fortunate than himself poorly. Case in point being the way he acts towards our maids. Hewill make absolutely no e ort to clean up after himself, believing such activities are beneathhim, and waiting for the maids to do all the work. He won’t even pick up his own used plates. How can I 
remind him that not too long ago, we were working in similar, laborious positions ourselves? I certainly don’t want our children to adopt these ugly habits from him.
Dear Clean Break,
He seems insecure in his newfound nouveau-richestatus and mistakenly thinks he needs toprove it by aunting it and treating thosebelow him shabbily. Start by taking the entire family to where you both started from, to give him and them a realistic perspective of the family’s humble beginnings. Then, plan visits to friends or relatives who are rich yet grounded, as a learning experience. Register the kids to beat him at his owngame; have them pretend to act super spoiltand rude to everyone, including their dad; thus, giving him a taste of his own bitter pill.
FACING THE PROBLEM
Dear Aunty D,
My younger sister developed a severe ear infection, which recently progressed into a facial nerve problem. Our doctor informed us that the issue will likely resolve itself over time and has advised against surgery due to her age. However, the damage to her facial nerves has given her an uneven grin and many of her classmates have been relentlessly cruel towards her, calling her names because of her irregular facial expression. My sister has been begging my parents for the surgical procedure and refusing to go to school. I want to help her but I have no clue what to do. 
Dear Facing the Problem,
Your sister needs to learn to fend for herselfagainst bullies and life’s adversaries on her own, and the sooner, the better. As a caring sibling, start by strengthening her from the inside out by building her self-esteemand self-con dence. Look for her untappedstrengths and abilities and then encourage and hone them so that they become her unique, signature skills. It’ll take a lot of work from you and a more than ordinary commitment from her, but it’ll boost her self-worth and enable her to hold her head high, knowing that she’s no less than anyone else in this competitive world.
Dear Aunty D,
Something funny is going on with my three kids. Last weekmarks the third time in as many months that they’ve comehome from school with their school uniforms in tatters. They claimed it was an accident but refuse to go into detail. The first two times I believed them, but now I’m starting to think they’ve been deliberately destroying their clothes. 
Money doesn’t grow on trees! I can’t keep buying them uniforms every month of the year. Why are they doing this to me? I could swear someone had a go at their uniforms with a pair of scissors. Or maybe they’re just playing too rough? I need help!
Dear Torn Up,
Has there been any change in their general mood? Have they ever expressed adislike for the school, or the uniform? It’s also pertinent that you meet the schoolcounsellor on your own to help gauge the possibility of harassment from peers andfear of retaliation if they tattled. If it’s plain mischief, then they should be made to reimburse their new uniforms from their own allowances.
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