More than just a mentor
BY AYUSH MADAN
As a teenager in high school, I struggled with a turbulent home environment. When my grades and attendance were declining, my school counsellor, Mrs. Raney, noticed something was wrong. Even though I never explicitly told her what was happening, she saw me and understood the burden on my shoulders. She did something so simple, yet unforgettable: she gave me two hugs. Those small moments of kindness have stuck with me, serving as a powerful reminder of how much just one person’s care can impact a life.
Mental health is no longer a hidden conversation – it’s now at the forefront of discussions about well-being, especially
for our children. More parents in the desi community are recognising this need, and the stigma around seeking help is fading. The pandemic forced us to rethink mental health, and even movies like Inside Out 2 (2024) have opened space for these important conversations.
As we start to accept just how crucial early support is, we now understand that children’s minds are like wet cement – what they experience now, good or bad, leaves a deep impression. School counsellors are often the first to step in, guiding students through anxiety, depression, trauma, and the weight of modern pressures. They play a crucial role, not just through addressing academic struggles, but also by helping children navigate emotional challenges.
In this Cover Story, Masala spoke with four Thai-Indian school counsellors, Aarti Arora Madarasmi,Roshni Sachdev Curtain,Rubani Sethi, and Roslin Srikuruwal about the evolving role of counselling in schools. They share how they’re working to ensure our children are not just safe, but emotionally strong. View our panel discussion on the state of counselling in Thailand with the video linked in the QR code, and read on to hear their stories.
AARTI ARORA MADARASMI
Primary School Counsellor, Bangkok Patana School
Aarti’s counselling journey began with a Bachelor of Science in Psychology at University of Melbourne, followed by a
Postgraduate Diploma in Psychology with a specialisation in early intervention at Monash University. After returning to
Bangkok, Aarti worked in the private sector, spending 15 years serving the community in mental health clinics and hospitals. During her clinical practice, she was invited into various international schools for consultations, sparking her interest in counselling services within school settings. This led her to enroll in a Master’s in school counselling, marking the beginning of her career in international schools.
What are strategies you use to help students develop their self-confidence in their academic and personal life?
Self-confidence or self-esteem is an integrate part of learning and growing. Children need to believe in themselves to try new and challenging material, whether it be academically, athletically or artistically. With the younger population, I believe simple and straightforward strategies are most effective. For example, I introduce the students to ‘the power of yet’. Often young children will say, “I can’t do this” or, “I am not good at this.” I ask them to add a ‘yet’ at the end of these sentences. By reframing their sentences, children develop the courage to attempt the task.
The objective of this strategy is to build resilience and a growth mindset. With the slightly older children (Years 4-6), I encourage them to listen to their inner voice. At this developmental stage, a lot of the negative statements such as, “I am not good enough” are not vocalised. So, I introduce them to their inner voice. I tell them we have an inner coach and critic in our heads. The inner coach motivates and encourages us, while the inner critic can be a hard on us. The key is learning to recognise and identify their inner voices and then use ‘the power of yet’ to reframe their inner thoughts. These are a few of many strategies children can use to build a positive self-concept.
How do you collaborate with teachers and parents to create a nurturing environment for young children who may struggle with adjustment or behavioural issues?
We believe in providing our families with a holistic approach. Parents, class teachers, and support teachers collectively meet to discuss the students concerns, goals, effective strategies, and progress. Communication is key when supporting a student through adjustments and transitions. When working with behavioural issues or misbehaviour, we ask, “What is the student trying to tell us with their behaviours and how can we better support this student?” rather than, “What consequences will we provide this student for their misbehaviour?” Misbehaviour is one of the ways a student uses to communicate their needs. The more information we can gather as a team, the better we are able to support the student.
However, in saying that, as a counsellor I am also very mindful of how much information to share with the team. My relationship with my students is based on trust and mutual respect. Therefore, when students have trusted me with some sensitive and private information, it is kept confiidential, unless there is a safeguarding concern. Our priority is the student’s safety and overall well-being.
What are the roles of play and creative activities in your counselling approach for primary students?
Therapeutic play is an integral part of counselling with the younger population. Young children may not have the language to express complex emotions and may need another mode of communication. Play is often an effective medium for sharing their world with us. There are many kinds of therapeutic play: Synergetic Play Therapy, Adlerian Play Therapy, Sand Play Therapy, etc. A counsellor will typically employ one or a combination of play techniques to build rapport and connect with the student. Once the student feels that he/she is in a safe space, they will use play to communicate their feelings and circumstance.
Unfortunately, I am not privileged to share my students’ experiences with play therapy, but I will say it is a powerful agent for growth and change.
ROSHNI SACHDEV CURTAIN
Middle School Counsellor, NIST International School
From a young age, Roshni was determined to work with children and adolescents, motivated by her own complex journey through school, and a desire to increase support accessibility for future generations.
After earning her psychology degree from the University of British Columbia (UBC), Roshni explored special education, which revealed her strong desire to connect with people on a deeper level. This led her to pursue a Master of Counselling in Australia, where she worked for Canteen, a non-profit organisation supporting young people affected by cancer. Following several years in Australia, Roshni and her husband David chose to pursue international teaching opportunities. They moved to Singapore, where she served as a Middle School Behaviour Intervention Specialist, further developing her counselling skills. This journey eventually brought her back to her alma mater, NIST International School (NIST).
How do you build trust and rapport with your students?
I truly believe that the foundation of effective counselling lies in establishing a sense of psychological safety with clients. As a Middle School Counsellor, I am committed to creating a non-judgmental environment where students feel supported, through fostering a warm atmosphere and treating everyone with kindness and respect. In small group and individual counselling sessions, I take the time to learn about students’ interests, strengths and backgrounds and consistently strive to demonstrate empathy by validating their feelings and experiences. The expectations around confidentiality are also very clear within my counselling context, and students have a strong understanding that their conversations are confiidential within the limits of safety.
One of the other critical ways in which I build trust and rapport with my students is through visibility and accessibility. At NIST, my role allows me to deliver a socioemotional curriculum through a class called Advisory+. These lessons enable me to provide age-appropriate education, check in with students, and gauge their well-being. Beyond counselling, I mentor student service groups, have coached football, and remain accessible during breaks and lunch periods. These varied interactions and roles help me build strong, trusting therapeutic relationships with students.
What does a ‘typical’ day for a school counsellor look like?
One of the most exhilarating experiences of being a Middle School Counsellor is that no two days are ever the same. A ‘typical’ day might involve a variety of tasks, including individual or group meetings with students, teaching Advisory+ lessons, parent meetings, as well as collaborating with stakeholders within the school. At the centre of everything I do is the well-being of students.
The availability of support and the ability to differentiate for student needs has transformed significantly over the last decade. We are very fortunate at NIST to have learning support specialists, gifted and talented teachers and allied health providers such as Speech Language Therapists and Occupational Therapists. As a counsellor who advocates for the needs of students, I can liaise with the invaluable resources within our school as well as outside resources that enhance student learning and well- being. Throughout the school year, I also deliver parent presentations on various topics such as transitions, and helping parents set boundaries around screen time.
Why is socioemotional well-being so important for our young people? How do you provide this support to your students?
Socioemotional well-being is the cornerstone to both academic and personal success. Research shows that students with strong socioemotional functioning are more likely to achieve higher grades, form healthier friendships, and manage their emotions more effectively. At NIST, we cultivate socioemotional growth through our well-being curriculum and therapeutic support. Our middle school and Advisory+ classes cover a wide range of topics, including friendships, stress management, peer pressure, body image, self-awareness, boundaries, alcohol, smoking/vaping, and sexuality education. Given the complexity and vulnerability of this developmental stage, it is crucial to provide support and kindness to both young people and their parents. I offer socioemotional support to students in both small groups and individual sessions, addressing concerns such as transitions, anxiety, stress, anger, friendship issues, and family dynamics.
RUBANI SETHI
Whole School Counsellor and Well-being Lead, DBS Denla British School
Rubani’s interest in psychology began in Grade 10 when she took her fiirst General Psychology class. Captivated by human behaviour’s complexities, she recognised the importance of understanding emotions and managing stress—lessons she experienced during her own struggles with self-esteem. Supported by her school counsellor and friends, Rubani discovered her desire to help others in a similar way.
To follow this path, she earned a Bachelor of Science in Psychology from Chulalongkorn University, a Bachelor of Arts in Psychology from the University of Queensland, and later a Master of Science in Counselling Psychology from Assumption University. Her experience as a Third Culture Kid often left her feeling misunderstood by her counsellor, inspiring her to become the kind of counsellor who could truly relate to those experiences.
What is one of the most challenging parts of the role as a school counsellor, and how do you manage it?
As a school counsellor, one of the most challenging aspects of my role is handling disclosures from students that may require breaking confiidentiality to prevent harm. It’s crucial for a counsellor to adhere to ethical codes, which include explaining the meaning and limits of confiidentiality in age-appropriate language. I inform students about the circumstances where confiidentiality must be broken, such as when they pose a danger to themselves or others, or when someone else is harming them. During initial sessions, I make it clear by saying, “What you say here stays here, unless someone is hurting you, you want to hurt someone else, you want to hurt yourself, or you give me permission to share with a trusted adult.”
The difficulty in such situations comes when I need to navigate the relationship with the student after reporting a safeguarding concern. I take steps to acknowledge the breach in confidentiality, explain the reasons behind it, and create space for open dialogue. Rebuilding trust takes time and effort, but it’s essential. Some students understand immediately, while others need time to process.
Being a school counsellor also involves balancing complex school policies, managing parents’ expectations, and gaining students’ trust. Parents may want to be fully informed about their child’s life at school, struggled with, but now it’s non-negotiable, but it’s important to maintain the child’s privacy. Despite these challenges, everyone shares a common goal—ensuring the safety and well-being of the student.
What is one of the most rewarding parts of being in the role of a school counsellor?
Aside from creating a safe space for students, one of the most fulfifilling aspects of my role is the necessity of prioritising self-care. Taking care of myself is crucial because it enables me to effectively support others. Before becoming a school counsellor, I didn’t fully understand the importance of self-care, but now it’s a vital part of my routine.
I often reflect on the analogy of the oxygen mask on an airplane: “In the event of an emergency, secure your own mask before helping others.” This reminder reinforces that taking care of oneself is not selfifish—it’ essential. Prioritising self-care benefits both personally and professionally, and it’s rewarding to know I can now consistently do so. In the past, self-care was something I and I find great satisfaction in maintaining my well-being.
What is one thing you feel students want their parents to know?
In my experience, one of the most common things students express is their desire for acknowledgment and encouragement from their parents. With the immense pressure to excel academically and socially, positive affirmations help combat negative thought and foster resilience.
This mindset shift helps children focus on opportunities and growth rather than dwelling on setbacks. When I ask students what they want to hear from their parents, responses like, “You are enough,” “I am proud of you,” and “You are loved and appreciated” often come up. These small affirmations can significant impact a child’s life. It’s important for parents to understand that these affirmations, though seemingly small, can significantly impact their child’s life in various ways.
ROSLIN SRIKURUWAL
Elementary Counsellor, NIST International School
Roslin Srikuruwal, currently an Elementary School Counsellor at NIST International School, was inspired by her own childhood experiences to pursue a career in counselling. Despite having a loving and supportive family, she felt the absence of someone at school who could help her navigate personal challenges during her elementary years. Later, during her teaching practicum at Monash University, she worked with teenagers facing difficult life circumstance such as grief, divorce, and bullying, which reaffirmed her belief in the importance of having a safe, supportive figure at school. This motivated her to pursue a counselling degree at Bond University, where she honed her skills to better support children’s emotional and social well-being. Today, at NIST, she is driven by the opportunity to be a consistent and steady presence in her students’ lives, with her family’s unwavering support fuelling her passion for the role.
How do you integrate play into your counselling practice?
Play is the language of children. It’s how they communicate, expressing what they may not be able to articulate in words. As a play therapy practitioner, I find it a privilege to see children recreate their own stories and make sense of the world through imaginative games and social interaction. I take an individualised approach, tailoring each session to fiit the unique needs and preferences of each child. I incorporate various creative approaches, such as storytelling, puppets, art, music, movement, and sandboxes. Role-playing is particularly effective in helping students navigate situations that cause anxiety or distress, such as friendship conflflicts. It provides a safe space for them to practice responses and develop problem-solving skills.
Play enables children to process emotions in a way that feels natural to them. When they engage in play, they try on new feelings, ideas, and roles. This process helps build resilience, boosts self-esteem, and allows them to explore their strengths while gaining a better understanding of themselves. Through play, children can safely overcome obstacles and grow emotionally.
What do you fiind the most rewarding about your role?
Working with children is a unique and joyful experience. They are naturally curious, imaginative, and full of potential. The most rewarding part of my role is the trust students place in me when they share their stories and seek support. Being able to be there for them in their time of need and act as their advocate is truly an honour. Children are at a critical stage in their development, and the experiences they have now will shape who they become. As an elementary school counsellor, I get to play a role in building the foundation of their educational and emotional journey.
I also cherish the relationships I build with students and their families. By fostering trust and connection, I’m able to understand each child on a deeper level, helping them navigate the complexities of growing up. I am fortunate to work with a team of dedicated professionals, and I feel grateful to collaborate with my fellow counsellors and educators daily.
How do you support students who are experiencing social emotional challenges?
At NIST, we follow a comprehensive counselling model that focuses on both prevention and responsive services. We integrate our well-being curriculum into regular classroom lessons, teaching students how to recognise and manage emotions, build positive relationships, and make responsible decisions. We also host parent sessions and school-wide initiatives that promote positive social-emotional skills and prevent challenges from escalating. These sessions cover a variety of topics, such as helping families through transitions, emotional regulation, and personal safety.
For students who need additional support, we offer individual and small group counselling sessions. In these sessions, I prioritise creating a safe, empathetic space where students feel heard. I actively listen to their stories, help them express their emotions, validate their feelings, and guide them in developing coping strategies that work for them.
Collaboration is key to providing consistent support. I work closely with teachers and parents to ensure students receive the care they need both inside and outside the classroom. By working with parents, I gain valuable insights into the child’s strengths and challenges, which helps us identify any potential barriers to their development. Together, we can create a comprehensive plan that supports the child’s growth.
