Outside the Script

BY AIDEN JEWELLE GONZALES

My mum will kill me if I didn’t serve you some chai and food!” Sumati Huber tells me with a laugh when I visit her in her cheerful home brimming with art that her husband had painted. “Honestly, I’m more of an auntie than I care to admit,” she adds conspiratorially as we both take a sip of our piping-hot chai – just as it should be. “I do send back my chai if it’s room temperature.”

Despite her claim to ‘auntie-hood,’ Sumati is someone who clearly colours outside the lines, apparent in her wry humour and the unafraid way she talks to me about her cherished family, who represent an unusual amalgamation of Indian, Swiss, and Chinese culture; the perils of having Indian hair in Bangkok’s humid monsoon season; and how, despite poking gentle fun at them, she’s constantly impressed by all the aunties who, she tells me dryly, are “younger than me, hotter than me, and skinnier than me.”

The genius behind Masala Lite’s beloved “Nama-Slay” column, Sumati is a born and bred Thai-Indian, having gone to international school in Bangkok and returning after studying in the US for her Bachelor’s degree. Starting as a writer and then editor at The Bangkok Post’s Guru magazine, Sumati tells me how beyond writing for magazines, she wanted a longer-length medium to talk about her experiences in her culture and upbringing, and the cultural conflict she’d experienced as a ThaiIndian. “I’m much better at writing than speaking,” she admits, which was belied by her eloquent and keenly observant take on society and generational changes as we spoke. Having just published her debut novel, Not Indian Enough, Sumati used that eloquence and wit to tell me more about breaking the mould, laughing at ourselves, and ultimately, accepting and embracing our community.

What prompted your interest in writing as a form of self-expression, and how did your career as a journalist, editor, and now author start?

I didn’t intend to become a writer, but even as a young girl I struggled a lot with my emotions – feeling things were unfair or different for me as an Indian girl. Writing was a bit like a diary for me to make sense of all the things going on in society, and it was the best medium to get my point across.

Throughout my career, I had the opportunity to work in a lot of creative writing and that is the tone that resonated most with me. Some of the topics I touch on are quite serious, and they could be very divisive, but by using humour and satire to touch upon it, it felt like holding up a mirror to society. Honestly, if you’re not being funny, then you’re just crying or being angry.

Your debut novel, Not Indian Enough, is deeply personal, touching on identity, societal expectations, and rebellion. What inspired you to turn these experiences into a story, and how much of Sanjana’s journey mirrors your own?

The disclaimer I put on the book is that it’s fiction, but if you know me well, you’ll know there’s a lot of Sumati in Sanjana. For me, writing is therapy and it allows me to make sense of things that don’t always make sense. It’s so powerful to have someone read your words and relate to them – even if there’s no solution to the issues you’ve raised, they can feel seen and know they’re not alone in the struggle. For me, that’s why I continue writing.

My novel does trace the journey of a rebellious protagonist, but rebellion is always subjective. For Sanjana, it starts with what she wears. She might be showing a bit too much skin, and she might be going out too late. Someone showing their arms and legs in a different culture might not be the end of the world, but for some Indians it might reflect back on their upbringing.

I wanted to touch on rebellion as an evolution of thought. It can start from something as small as what you wear, to who you marry, who your friends are, or what path you choose for your life. And your parents may try to quash any defiance the moment they see it, and the book explores that dynamic. Overall, however, the tone of the book is hopeful; it aims to be a way for you to make sense of society and see yourself represented in small and big ways.

Tell us a little about the writing and publication process of your novel.

I had been working on the novel for a while, but I finished it during the COVID-19 period. Since then, I’d been sending my book proposal out to numerous publishers in India and beyond. Now, a couple of years and many revisions later, it’s being published in India with Nu Voice Press and distributed by Simon and Schuster India, which is amazing. They own the exclusive rights to my book in India, and it’ll be out on Amazon soon.

The publisher had initially contacted me to tell me they were interested in my book proposal, and we worked together in the entire editing process. I was excited to work with India because the Thai-Indian community, including myself, live in a bubble. The inspiration for my book is that when people leave India, they tend to be a lot more conservative than people who live in India because they’re away from their motherland and they’re very fiercely protective of what it means to be Indian, whether it’s through our rituals, being vegetarian on certain days, how we dress, or how we speak.

I’m excited for this book to give India a little insight into the Thai-Indian upbringing, so they can see different interpretations of what being ‘Indian’ means. India is so diverse, and being Thai-Indian is a very small part of the vast Indian identity. But it’s nice to know that the book can shine a light on our little community.

As someone who grew up in a conservative Indian household, how did you navigate the clash between tradition and self-expression, both in your personal life and in your writing?

I don’t know if my family would call themselves conservative! [Laughs] As immature as it sounds, I just did what I wanted without worrying about the repercussions. I honestly believe that there is no ‘right’ or ‘wrong’ whether someone is more conservative or more rebellious. We just need to find a medium where we can have constructive dialogue.

Yes, when I did what I wanted to in my personal life and in my writing, there was a lot of push-back and I did endure a lot of difficult times with my family and in the community. But I’m proof that when you do have that difficult conversation, you can come out of it and turn it into something quite beautiful.

Do you have any incidences where you had to have that conversation or compromise with your family?

You can read about it in my book! [Laughs] As embarrassing as it is to admit, I didn’t feel like I compromised very much; my parents probably had to compromise a lot more, and God bless them. If anything came out of it, it’s that I have learned from my experiences.

But my parents were not given a daughter that followed the path they envisioned, so they had to challenge some of their own beliefs and perceptions. From what I’ve observed, what we call ‘conservative’ beliefs often stem from how people were raised. They don’t know any better. While the generations now are a lot more ‘woke’ and ‘cancel culture’ is real, it’s important to remember that for our parents’ generation, it’s all they knew as a child. You have to find a resolution and find peace – which is the case with my parents and me.

The dynamic of marrying outside your culture is a key theme in both your life and your book. How has your marriage to a non-Indian man influenced your perspective on love, identity, and family expectations?

The one thing I learned is that I definitely do not get a lot of food from his family! If we ever have an argument, I tell myself, I should have married an Indian – at least I would get dinner every day! [Laughs] Of course, they show their love in other ways, and I’m so grateful for them – even if I’m a bit hungry! I’ve always felt a little more Western in my thoughts, and being Indian has only become more pronounced now that I have children who are not quite sure where they’re from, as they have several ethnicities.

Ultimately, however, my husband is amazing and his values align with my core values – he’s responsible, respectful, he has a good work ethic, and he takes care of his family. Sure, the Indian culture is a little more dominating in our family unit, but he’s very respectful and knowledgeable with our traditions. For me, it’s a really great experience.

Humour can rarely be explained, but you’re renowned in the Indian community for your sharp wit and humour, and indeed, your column, “Nama-Slay”, is always a hit with our readers. What would you say informs your humour and writing style, and what do you think makes your insights resonate so deeply with our readers?

My humour is observational, and I do tend to be very observant when I go out. People can relate to it because I derive from real experiences that we go through, and I try to reflect my own experiences. People just want to feel understood and heard, and I hope that’s what my writing provides. I’m not saying that it has to start a revolution, but it’s nice that we can poke a bit of fun at ourselves and not take ourselves so seriously.

I do touch on the pressure from ‘aunties’ and societal expectations, but at the end of the day, I don’t mean to pick on them – I love my aunties. And they feed me well! Ultimately, if aunties can read it and laugh at themselves, even if they may not wish to change themselves, that’s fine! It’s not our burden to change them, but our burden to change ourselves.

Do you have any final advice or insight for our readers?

I’m so appreciative of all my readers, thank you for all your support! As for some final advice – don’t be afraid to deviate from the path that you think you have to follow, but also try to have a conversation with your family even if it’s hard. Today, we have the opportunity to be a little more open – with them, our families, and our children, and that change starts with us.