From navigating true love to feeling obsolete, Aunty D dispenses sage advice.

Prince or Phantom?

Dear Auntie D,

I think I’m in love – there, I’ve said it. In the 25 years of my life, I don’t think I’ve ever said that out loud, but I think it’s the real deal. I’ve been dating this guy for six months now, and we met through the usual ways that we Millennials meet (I won’t go into too much detail!). It hasn’t been that long, but he’s everything that I want in a husband – kind, smart, financially stable, and ambitious. I’m thinking of spending the rest of my life with him, but how do I know he’s the real deal? It’d be easier if our introduction was arranged by our families, or if we had any mutual friends, but we don’t. How do I know if the man of my dreams…is just in my dreams?

Dear Prince or Phantom,

It’s quite true that ‘love is blind’, but luckily, you’re willing to remove the blindfolds and see him for who he truly is. It’s best to observe him in his ‘natural habitat’ and notice how he interacts with his family, your family, his friends, his staff, and the waiters and doormen and women of varying ages and demeanors. Does he maintain his equilibrium and handle messy situations in a composed and respectful manner? Does he listen with his heart and not just with his ears? Does he exercise empathy before making a decision, and that too, irrespective of whether the person is lesser or an equal, or young or aged? That’s when you can truly tell his character. 

Can’t spell enraged without ‘aged’

Dear Auntie D,

I have a friend who is very much my junior, and in my opinion, has far less experience in my field. He recently joined my company, which shall remain unnamed, but suffice to say that we both work in corporate. I was initially excited for him to join, as I was eager to show him the ropes, and even recommended him to my bosses. However, after a mere year here, he was promoted to a position higher than mine – a promotion that has been my due for a while now! I’m happy for him but I can’t help but feel overlooked. What do I do? 

Dear Can’t spell enraged without ‘aged,’

Life is not a race, nor a competition! There’s no deadline for when things should or must happen, including the eventual ‘dead’ line which we’ll all eventually cross, at our own sweet time. Be happy for him, for “heavy is the crown of success.” Meanwhile, practice patience, which Joyce Meyer says, “is not the ability to wait, but how you act while waiting.” So, use the time afforded you as an underling to hone your skills further. Do whatever you’re assigned to do with razor-sharp focus and undiluted commitment, and very soon you’ll be noticed and earn your place in the sun! 

The Silver Lining

Dear Auntie D,

I’m the CEO of a tech company, and although we’re small, we’re at the vanguard of our niche. Everyone in our team is young, dynamic, and up-to-date with cutting-edge trends, but I like to think that I’ve kept up well with developments in our field, and my experience is fundamental in guiding our team. However, because the tech space is so driven by the youth, I do occasionally feel that people see my age as a barrier. I’ve recently noticed some grey hairs and I’m against dyeing it, but I’m worried that going silver will just make me look even more obsolete. How do I maintain my dignity?

Dear The Silver Lining,

Please don’t second-guess yourself, and instead, join the faction of bold and brazen actresses and models; the rich and the famous, who are confident about who they are underneath, or despite, the grey! Although it’ll be a test in patience and self-confidence while you go through Sharon Stone’s Cruella stage, you’ll come out of the other end with better hair-health, which you can bolster further by using organic products and frequent oil massages, as well as the much-overlooked, 100 head-down brushes every night. With the money you save, hand yourself over to an expert hairstylist and see the magic he’ll work to project a confident and new you!